Making Our Way Through Loss
To preface.... If you feel this is for you, then it is ♥
It's raining, nearing midnight on the eve of the full Sagittarius moon. I had wanted to see this moon, as it is important in my progress forward, especially after today's heaviness. In fact, 2025 seems to be a year of heaviness, so I'm not sure why I am surprised by the waves of intensity that just keep coming. I pulled out Caroline Myss' book on prayer. I know of no other way to cope with the emotions I'm feeling. And I also feel the emotions of those whose lives have affected mine in some small or large way since this year began. When one cannot find words or resolution, there is prayer (thank you Caroline).
I am a woman of extreme depth; I always have been. At times I see clearly the absolute purpose of life on earth, and at other times I almost scream at the creator, "What is going on, how can you let this suffering, this abuse, this loss, happen?" That is the paradox. We come here to earth, arriving with our overnight bag from the higher realms, looking at this beautiful rose garden. Wow, we've arrived, we are fed and clothed and all set to lunge out of the gate. But wait. Where are the instructions? Where is the owner's manual. This is hard. Love is greatness and feels so good, and then, the pain of losing that love (someone), is enough to make us ask for the first train out of here. I did not sign up for this!
Certainly there are wonderful things, blessings; and this is where it begins to occur to us that the stronger we love, the more it will hurt when that inevitable end arrives. But I wonder, and have wondered, when it comes to death, is death truly what we have been taught to believe it is? I mean death of any kind, not just an end to a physical body, that I'm speaking of. An end to a love, an end to an amazing job, the end of anything we have grown attached to or which has brought great joy---one of the reasons for living. JOY. So in order to know true, deep love, we must also know loss, because if we could have everything forever, what value would it have? Its like having a whole drawer full of candy, so much that you become literally sickened by sugar....what value would that delicious piece of chocolate then have? None.
I know this seems to be a very simplistic way to view life and grief, but I believe it to be the truest way. Our creator does not offer us the option to come into physical bodies and then say to us, "Ok, now for the next 80 years, be perfect". Who would bother to visit earth? It would be just a broken carnival ride. You could sit in it, but nothing would move, and what would your soul learn?
I believe that we are reunited between lives with those souls (animals included) we have shared lessons with here on earth. There is a recognition and reunion unlike anything our little brains could imagine. A coming home. A remembering, and a gratitude for sharing these lessons we agreed upon, with each other.
Remembering these things helps so much when I feel grief like I have felt today, grief that wasn't really mine to feel, but someone else's experience of a deep loss, but that did trigger memories of losses I have known, recent and not so recent. It makes one feel that they will collapse inward and cease to breathe, unable to move in their own skin. Asking, why? Why why why....
The why is answered with the word LOVE. And with the understanding that having had the love in the first place, having shared the blessing of the time together, was the most important thing. I once heard it put this way-- the depth of your grief is indicative of the depth of your love for the person or animal. It is directly entwined like our two DNA strands. We cannot know one without the other. And we are given the blessing, in time, of loving again, and again and again. Others will need us. In time we will pick ourselves up and offer love again in honor and remembrance of those we have lost to the afterlife.
Still, nothing makes it easier, but getting through each moment of each day and feeling all of one's feelings, does help. There is no hurry to 'get over it' or 'heal'. Just being with oneself and being very gentle with each moment and memory, is the best way to cope. The time now, that I am finally able to finish this message, is nearing full moon time. Its time to bless all of the lost hearts, the broken souls, and to remind all of us that the Divine is with us and has never, ever left us. I'm feeling a bit more level now, and to those of you that need to be witnessed and understood in your time of grief, I see you. Your God sees you. And your angels are already at work healing your heart and soul. What we cannot see is so much stronger than what we can see. You are loved.
With Blessings,
Paula ♥